Konor got a big puffy jacket for winter the other day. He looks like the Michelin man! So adorable! He's really puffy so it's hard to hold him. But it was a much needed jacket. His are either too big or too small, he grows so fast! So that was the final piece we needed for him I think. We're all ready for winter now!
Today when I dropped Konor off at school he started to cry. He just wanted his "mama". Which a part of me loves and I wanted to just grab him up and take him to work, but alas, I could not. I am picking him up early today because my office is doing a Generations Story Time in honor of our 25th anniversary. I'm excited to have him here with me. I love bringing him with me wherever I go.
It's amazing how my self esteem is wrapped up in what I do with Konor. If someone doesn't agree with something I do with him or for him, I get really defensive and upset. Parenting is so personal! That is one big lesson I'm learning. With all the information I've read, it's still super hard to parent as good as someone thinks you should. I really struggle with that. I want people to see him and know he has the best parents. I put a lot of thought into how I interact with him and when someone disagrees or says "this way is better" it really upsets me. That's happened a few times and I don't know how to handle it. Why do people need to tell you how to parent? I guess there are different reasons behind it, and I'm sure I've done it too but it really stings. It also really takes a toll on me.
Throughout this new journey of balancing I'm also really understanding the pain that God must have felt giving his son for our salvation. Wow, that would really suck. How hard it would be to watch the world hate your son and kill him, just to save them. That's true love. God knew that Jesus would rise again, but I think the pain of the journey to that point it break your heart.
I am still trying to figure out how to find time to "do it all" as a working mom. It seems like I have no time to really do anything. My mom asked me to look at a website yesterday and I couldn't. I'm constantly on the go, watching Konor, folding clothes, doing the dishes etc. Kris helps me out a lot, and I am so lucky for that. But we both want to make sure that our home runs smooth and is happy. Well we haven't figured that out yet. Haha, it's a pretty choppy rhythm. We'll do really good with the chores, then we'll be really tired one day and that'll throw us off. First two weekends we were out of town and I think that really screwed us up. Laundry is everywhere, dishes aren't done, there is disorganization... Chaos! I think it'll be smoother at the end of the month. Just in time for the holidays!
By the way, Konor will be 9 months old on Saturday. Time flies when you're in love!
I think it is hard for us all to be strong in what we believe in sometimes especially when the pressures of society seem against us. It is all about instinct and what feels right to us as parents in how we raise our kids. There are so many different parenting styles and we don't have to fit in one. I think weather we are super crunchy or by the books on cry it out or way into all that gadgets that are out there these days, our kids will excel with us as their parents that love them more then any other person could. After 4.5 years now I have really come to respect the many different ways we can all raise our kids and I know you will too as time goes on. Hope other peoples thoughts can help you and roll off your shoulder when you need it. I think you are a fabulous mother and I can see that beaming from you every time I am around you. It is sad that most people are not to savey when it comes to giving suggestions. You guys keep up the good work your little guys is so lucky :)
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